Book Review - "Mommy, I'm Still In Here."

With insight and intimacy, Kate L. McLaughlin candidly shares the realities of parenting children with Bipolar Disorder. No other book so eloquently and honestly conveys the physical realities and battered emotions of a family caught in the swirling storm of a child s hallucinations and psychosis. Nothing else accurately depicts the frenzy of mania, or suicide attempts and their bittersweet aftermaths. No other writer so aptly illustrates the personal changes in parents of disabled children, nor connects them to the emotional and spiritual growth borne of their occurrence. This book supports, educates, and informs the reader, offering hope and encouragement to anyone living with chronic illness or raising teens.

About the Author:
Kate L. McLaughlin utilized her public speaking talents and teaching experience to train and motivate fellow public school teachers and instructional aides as a Special Programs Coordinator for the Upland School District in California. She frequently spoke to women s and youth groups on the topics of communication, education, and family issues. McLaughlin is a member of the Depression and Bipolar Alliance, the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill, and the Juvenile Bipolar Research Foundation, and participates in NAMI s Family to Family program.

I had the pleasure of getting this book, preproduction. Here are my thoughts:

"As a mother of two children with mental illness and as a teacher and advocate for better mental health, I know that Kate McLaughlin has not only written a story about my family, but about hundreds of other families as well. What we want you all to know as parents, is that we love our children, our children have a strength equivalent to Hercules and consequently, we want them to have the same things all other parents want for their children: a quality of life that provides MORE than adequate medical care, opportunities for a successful life and choices that allow them to exhibit and explore the special qualities they have. We love them. We want you to accept them."
—Deborah Rose, Director of Educational Development—NAMI Texas

You can pre-order this book on Amazon.com.

Childrens Book about Bipolar Disorder - on Lulu.com

Joshua Wears a Red Cape
The Little Boy Who Beats the Bipolar Villain!

A story of love, courage and recovery for a boy named Josh, who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder as a child.

An inspiration for children, families, teachers and professionals everywhere!


A children’s book about mental illness that gives hope for children and their families.
Self Published by author and Josh’s mom, Deborah Rose
Find it on http://www.lulu.com/celtwolfe or http://www.celtwolfe.com







In 2007, Deborah Rose of Texas wrote an original short story that has been published in the Chicken Soup for the Soul: Children with Special Needs,. This book contains truly remarkable, inspiring stories of support, understanding and triumph that tug at the heartstrings of anyone who reads them.

The story received so much attention, Deborah Rose decided to tell the WHOLE story of her son, Josh and how he was actually relieved to be diagnosed with a mental illness. Why? An illness can be treated and this gave him hope for himself and his future. This is a story of courage and determination that is inspiring to anyone who has had obstacles that seemed insurmountable. And it is a story that can be shared with children as young as two, written in honest and easy to understand language.

Deborah Rose owns a litigation support and investigative consulting firm and currently acts as the Director of Educational Development for NAMI Texas (National Alliance on Mental Illness.) Deborah enjoys reading, writing, debating and e-baying. There are more books in Deborah’s near future. Please email her at dcr.isgu.com.

To purchase a copy please go to http://www.lulu.com/celtwolfe

Copyright 2007 Celtwolfe. © • All Rights Reserved.

Volunteering 101 - You can and are needed!!!!

For those of you who are fearful of volunteering or maybe feel that you have little to contribute, I’d like to share with you a true story, that just happened last week. It is a story about the power of ONE.

My mother, Lula Madge, is a 5’3” pistol. She’s 75 years old and just recently, this summer widowed. My stepdad had diabetes, colon cancer (twice),Alzheimer’s and heart problems and his health had been on the downslide for at least 10 years. Since his death in June, my mom had been staying busy taking care of their affairs and putting her life on track as a single woman living alone for the first time in her life.

Last week she called me and asked where she could get information about NAMI. My mother does not own a computer and knows nothing about the internet. So I gave her the closest NAMI affiliate in her area, Carthage, TX – NAMI Longview. Paula Hendrix is a wonderful woman and a VFT teacher and I knew she would take good care of my mom. Frankly I wasn’t sure why my mom needed any info but it was a busy day, so I didn’t question her about it.

The next thing I know, I get an email from Paula telling me she had talked to my mom and she was getting calls that stated they had heard that she was the place to get information!!! Putting two and two together always gives me Lula Madge so I called her.

After talking to Paula it seems, my mother had received a large packet of NAMI brochures which she promptly took to the local Carthage library. Lula Madge explained that this was vital information about mental illness that Panola County needed and she would appreciate if they would keep it on hand and make it available to the public. She also gave them a copy of Chicken Soup – Children with Special Needs. I was very pleased to hear this, but there is more.

In the Panola County area, is a little radio show called “Swap and Shop” where the local folk can call in and advertise items they have for sale and request items they need to buy. Last week, Lula Madge called “Swap and Shop” and announced that she had a Public Service Announcement. She said – “Listen up all you grandparents, parents, and aunts and uncles. Mental illness is something we all need to know about, especially how it affects our youngsters. There is plenty of information now at the Carthage library and if you need more information, here is who you call.” She then proceeded to give out the name and number for NAMI Longview.

This happened just a week ago. The library is almost out of brochures and pamphlets and Paula emailed me yesterday to tell me that she has received several phone calls that have told her they got her name and phone number form the radio.

I would estimate that the total time invested by my mother, with phone calls to Paula, to the radio and a trip to the library is around two hours. This is just one example of how you can make a difference in your community and for NAMI. Every effort, every phone call and every action to support NAMI is important and counts. And you may never know how many people you help or how many lives you touch, but you do make a difference. Please do not hesitate to volunteer and to act when your heart speaks to you.
And I would like to thank you in advance for all you do and for all you will do.
Thank you.

Dallas Morning News Article Featuring Josh and Me- And Chicken Soup Book

Bipolar diagnosis helps mom, son shift thoughts on mental illness
Garland: Mother, son say bipolar diagnosis made them grow stronger
12:00 AM CDT on Thursday, October 11, 2007
By ALICIA M. COLLIER / Special Contributor to The Dallas Morning News
Deborah Rose remembers well the day her perspective changed.

NAN COULTER/Special Contributor
Deborah Rose's short story about son Joshua was recently published in a Chicken Soup for the Soul book.
During a dark period of family chaos, confrontations with strangers over her son's actions and an arson allegation against the boy, a doctor broke the news to the two of them that Joshua was bipolar.
For the Garland mother, the diagnosis carried implications of difficult treatment and shame. But for Joshua, it was liberating. As Mrs. Rose sat in the car trying to absorb the shock, he asked if they could celebrate.
"Don't you get it, Mom?" Mrs. Rose recalls her son saying. "We're celebrating because I am sick. I'm not evil."
Thirteen years later, mother and son can both laugh about the painful past. Mrs. Rose has written about it, too, winning publication of her and Joshua's short story in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Children With Special Needs.
"I remember ... [the doctor] saying, 'No one in their right mind gets in trouble every day,' " Mrs. Rose recalled. "I remember thinking about what it was doing to me as a person and how it was affecting my family.
"But I never thought about how ... [Josh] felt about it."
With a new perspective and a mission to eradicate the stigma associated with mental illness, Mrs. Rose got involved in raising awareness about mental illness, especially among children.
On a whim, she e-mailed her story to the staff compiling stories for Chicken Soup. Its publication – the book came out in paperback in September – opened doors, and today, Mrs. Rose speaks as an educator for the National Alliance on Mental Illness.
"I share this story everywhere I go. It causes people to shift their thinking," Mrs. Rose said. "... I've got a lot to say, but sometimes people don't want to hear it. So I'll write it down, and they can read it later."
Today, Mrs. Rose and her son, now 22, enjoy the friendship she feared would elude them during his adolescence. Josh is living on his own and is a caseworker helping homeless and drug-addicted people at the Salvation Army and pursuing a master's in business.
But even with the struggles, he doesn't wish he'd never been mentally ill.
"It makes me a stronger person," he said, noting that his experiences have given him empathy for others who have troubles. "I have a heart for helping people."
Alicia M. Collier is a freelance writer in Plano.

Core Emotions

This is not really in my time budget, but I had to take the time to share this with you. In the VFT trainings, we talk about the importance of getting to our core emotions and sharing that with our children and even others during important times of communication. Even for us who are old "pros" at this, at times, we have to be reminded that not only to get to our core emotion but to share it in a way that our children hear it.This Thanksgiving will be the third Thanksgiving I have had a child in the hospital in the past 7 or 8 years. (I try not to keep track.) This is my first holiday hospitalization for my daughter, Caiti. As most of you know, my son, Josh is in recovery and has a strong recovery plan that has been working for him since he was 16, with one break that occurred last year during his divorce. What many of you may not know is that my daughter, Caiti, is struggling with her recovery and is just now 16. Both of my children have a diagnosis of bipolar disorder but you wouldn't know it from their symptoms at times. This disease is as individual as the people it afflicts. So my husband and I have had a huge education process to go through, just like we knew nothing about mental illness, while striving to help Caiti.The past year has been a huge struggle for Caiti and our entire family. Caiti is currently in the hospital and it was beginning to look like she might be there a very long time. She didn't want to talk to me and when she did, the conversations were short and not very productive. I had been expressing my core emotions until I was blue in the face. But I was having a good visit with her if she didn't ask me to leave after 15 minutes. Then it occurred to me – while I may have been saying all the right things – my honest feelings, I hadn't been saying them in a way that Caiti could accept them. DOH!!!!! Did I feel like a big dummy! My daughter didn't like to hear things, she likes to READ and HOLD the paper and go back and READ and HOLD the paper, over and over and over. Guess what? So does her mother. I don't hear things well either. So why did it take me so long to realize that she was the same way? So before visitation last night, I sat down and wrote her a letter, not apologizing, not berating her or me, but just expressing my core emotions. I expressed love for her. Frustration for not understanding her needs better. Regret for not being able to help her feel more protected. Even though she is safe, she doesn't feel safe and I acknowledged that. Anxiety is a huge part of her illness and while I don't understand it, I told her I accept it and will take that into account when making decisions. Caiti read the letter immediately and began to cry and grabbed my hand. She then told me she loved me and was ready to come home and go to work on getting better. A two page letter in five minutes accomplished what a million words had not been able to do in a year's time. Please share this with your VFT classes and support groups. Core emotions are essential in communicating effectively with our children. Knowing how to present them so they can understand them is just as important. And there is always something to learn every day, that will help us support our children in helping themselves. Thank you for letting me share this with you.

Author's Note: VFT is an education program from NAMI Texas for families who have a child with a mental illness - Visions For Tomorrow

The Power of Music and Mental Health - Is a Cure in our own head?

Music has charms to soothe the savage breast
To soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak.
William Congreve

Ah, music. A magic beyond all we do here!
J. K. Rowling

Music is a discipline, and a mistress of order and good manners, she makes the people milder and gentler, more moral and more reasonable.
Martin Luther

Do you believe in rock ’n roll,
Can music save your mortal soul,
Don McLean

The benefits of music have been known and appreciated by the human race since the first day a bird was heard singing in the trees. We use music to celebrate, dance, rejoice, grieve, protest, pray, meditate and express unrequited love.
Having music to express ourselves and every emotion we could imagine was not enough. We turned to music as therapy, a way to improve ourselves and how we feel and how our brain processes the world around us. Music therapy utilizes music within a therapeutic relationship to address physical, psychological, cognitive, and social needs of individuals. Knowing all this as a parent with two children with a mental illness (bipolar disorder) my main interest in the Piano Wizard was not whether my child could learn to play the piano, but how learning to play the piano would be of benefit to her and help her in her recovery treatment plan in managing her symptoms.
After learning about the symptoms of bipolar disorder, it did not take us long as a family to see that music could have a very definite NEGATIVE effect on their attitudes and behavior. Initially, I had thought that my son and daughter would listen to heavy metal music or very loud, thumping music when their symptoms were elevating. What I learned, as I began to keep a journal of their moods and attitudes was that IF they listened to this music and only had a slightly agitated mood, both of them would experience extremely escalating moods that included agitation, hyperactivity, and often could lead to aggression. Knowing this, music and even video games became much regulated in our home.
However, the other side of this coin was true in just the opposite way. If either child was in a sad or depressed attitude, even slightly blue, listening to slow, sad music would only make the mood worse, often leading into a bout of depression if they were not stopped.
Knowing that music, from just a listening stand point, could be so powerful, I was excited to test the waters to see what LEARNING music could do for a child who has a brain disorder that is based upon rapidly changing moods.
The first day, my 16 year old daughter began using Piano Wizard, it took me over 45 minutes to get her to sit down at the computer and agree to even try it. Our agreement was that she would go through the first steps of the program for 15 minutes and then give me some feedback and she could then be free for other activities of her own choosing. An hour later, I heard her calling me to the computer room and she sounded excited! My daughter never gets excited. I ran to see why she was calling me and she was still sitting at the computer desk. “Listen, she said. I can play the piano.” And then she began to play for me several of the songs on the first program, using BOTH hands. I asked her if she had been playing since I had left her in the room and she said she had. I was amazed! She had been playing, on her own initiative for over an hour!
My 16 year old daughter continued to play every day, on her own initiative for the next three weeks. This is a child who has not shown any initiative on her own for any activity since second grade. During that time, her attitude at home was friendlier, and she was more cooperative with the family. Prior to beginning Piano Wizard, her demeanor had been one that was angry, argumentative, and surly. She was more focused at school and had discontinued sleeping in class all day. She had been failing three classes and within a three week period, had brought her grades up to a C average. And she no longer complained about the music styles I listened to in the car nor pushed me to listen to bass banging music.
Hygiene has always been a problem for her due to her depression. She began dressing in other clothing other than black and wearing make up and hair ribbons.
These changes may not seem like a lot but for a child who has had extreme mood swings and in between those times, suffers from extreme depression, this was like a golden vacation for her and for our family.
Unfortunately, due to a chemical change in her due to a spurt of growth, this made her medication for bipolar disorder less than effective and she required to be hospitalized to help get her stabilized with a new medication regime. However, and she agrees, when she returns home, Piano Wizard, just for fun, will be a part of her recovery treatment plan, because it helps her to think clearly, she enjoys it, feels she is accomplishing something and sees a different person when she looks at herself in the mirror.
I highly recommend Piano Wizard as a tool of accomplishment and as a tool of enjoyment for any child with a brain or mood disorder.

What do you think about mental illness?

In the Dallas Morning News today, is an entire section on Childhood Diabetes. One of the articles states in the beginning: “Doctors have to call diabetes a disease. You don’t. It’s a physical condition – one you can control. No ity parties if you can read the three previous sentences. Even though there’s no cure for it, this is a diagnosis you can do something about. If you can do for yourself, be proactive and positive.”

What if you took the word diabetes out of the statement and replaced it with mental illness?

“Doctors have to call mental illness a disease. You don’t. It’s a physical condition – one you can control. No pity parties if you can read the three previous sentences. Even though there’s no cure for it, this is a diagnosis you can do something about. If you can do for yourself, be proactive and positive.”

Does this concept offend you? Does it upset you? Do you find it empowering? Is it even a true statement?

Why I am here.....

I have random thoughts.. some politacally correct and in line with my profession and clients, sometimes not. I hate censorship, even though I am offended by many htings I hear and read lately. So this is my place to vent, to share, to provoke, to do many things. I hope you read and I hope you join in and share. Go ahead - stir the pot, shake things up, tell me what you think. I will respond.